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This article assumes you have invested time in these self-study
. It extends these three pages on ways to break the [wounds + unawareness]
Please read them now if you haven't recently. The article is written to you if you're in one of these professions: |
clergy and church leaders
consulting - all subjects
education - all levels
executives and managers
human resources
legal services
medical services |
professional mediators - all levels
law enforcement
coaching and mental-health services
personal growth, motivation, and training
public media
social policy and law makers
social work and community organization |
This article propose that you have an opportunity and a moral obligation to inform your coworkers and the people you serve about how to prevent the toxic effects of the [wounds + unawareness] cycle in their lives and our society. Notice your reaction to this idea...
This article provides... -
premises about human-service professionals and the [wounds + unawareness] cycle; -
perspective: is stress prevention your ethical responsibility? -
status check: key factors that affect your professional effectiveness, and... -
ways you can help break the cycle with co-workers and those you serve.  Premises
See how you feel about these ideas. A = "I agree," D = "I disagree, and ? = "I'm not sure," or "It depends" (on what?) Notice how you feel as you consider each of these...
1) Our society currently doesn't teach the public enough about these key topics: (A D ?) |
normal personalities
communication |
healthy relationships
losses and healthy grief |
healthy families
effective parenting | |
the lethal [wounds + unawareness] cycle |
2) No matter what a person's presenting (surface) problems are, their underlying primary problems are some mix of unseen false-self
+
+
of these topics. (A D ?) |
3) Many human-service professionals (like you?) are significantly wounded, unaware, and
They don't (want to) know this, and deny or minimize it. Many unconsciously choose work in low-nurturance organizations, and their protective
will deny, minimize, or justify this and resist changing it. (A D ?) |
4) Many people who train, certify, license, hire, supervise, fund, and evaluate human-service profes-sionals and programs are
of low-nurturance childhoods in protective denial. Most are unaware of this, what it
and how to
. (A D ?)
5) Most human-service professionals, programs, and organizations focus on reducing personal and social problems, rather than preventing them. This is partly true because public motivation and demand for prevention is lower. (A D ?)
6) Your professional skills and energy are better spent preventing stress than reducing it. (A D ?)
Who just responded to these premises - your
or
Is Stress Prevention Your Responsibility? |
Do you accept that the [wounds + unawareness] cycle is real, toxic, and widespread? If so, do you feel morally responsible to alert other people to it and how to avoid or break it? This is no different than if you were among the first people to be aware of AIDS, West Nile virus, or the risk of cancer from nicotine and exposure to ultra-violet rays. If you don't alert people - who will? |
If you're not motivated to prevent part or all of the [wounds + ignorance] cycle with some group of people now, why not acknowledge that and stop reading? This mission is not for everyone...
Priority check: get undistracted, breathe well, and rate your current professional priorities honestly: on a scale of one (my main professional satisfaction comes from helping people reduce current stress) to five (my main satisfaction comes from preventing people from being stressed, rate myself as a ___. Would you rather put out forest fires or prevent them? Is your true Self (capital "S") answering this?
If you are interested in stress prevention, your effectiveness will depend partly on some key factors. See how you stand with them now... Status Check
Raise your self-awareness by assessing yourself. T = "true" or "I agree;" F = "false" or "I disagree;" and ? = "I'm not sure, don't know, or don't care."
I'm sure my true Self is
my personality now. (T F ?) If you're not sure, your respon-ses below may be distorted.
I can clearly describe the concepts of (a) a multi-part personality and (b) a true Self and false self to an average teen. (T F ?)
I can name at least five
that indicate a true Self is guiding an adult or child now. (T F ?)
I can name (a) the six
that many people don't know they have, and (b) at least four
of these wounds. (T F ?)
I have assessed myself for these wounds honestly, and have evaluated my own need for personal recovery from them. (T F ?) If not, empathizing with wounded coworkers and clients will be harder.
I have honestly evaluated the nurturance level of my childhood and current families and my workplace, and I can clearly describe what the levels mean in my life. (T F ?)
I can name seven vital subjects that most Americans are unaware of now, and I have thoughtfully
myself on each of them. (T F ?)
I have honestly evaluated whether these wounds and unawarenesses have significantly af-fected (a) me and (b) my family now. (T F ?)
I understand how false-self wounds and unawarenesses
the generations and are spreading in our culture. (T F ?)
I agree that false-self wounds and unawareness cause many serious personal, family, and social problems for average people like those I work with and serve professionally. (T F ?)
On a scale of 1 (no interest) to 5 (high interest), my motivation to reduce the wounds and unawareness in our family now is a ___.
On a scale of 1 (no interest) to 5 (very interested), my motivation to help the people I serve professionally and/or my co-workers, to understand this [wounds + unawareness] cycle and its effects is a ___.
The first place to become effective at preventing personal, family, and social stress is with myself. (T F ?)
Note your thoughts and emotions now - your "self talk." It's caused by your busy subselves reacting to what you just experienced. What did you just learn about yourself and your profession? Options
You can help to break this [wounds + ignorance] cycle, whatever your human-service role or back-ground! Your profession, training, and experience give you more much authority and credibility than aver-age lay people in informing and motivating clients, students, and patients. Consider broad possibilities like these...
Decide who usually
your personality - your Self (capital "S") or "someone else." If it's not your Self (capital "S"), make reducing your false-self wounds your second-highest life pri-ority behind protecting your integrity and wholistic health.
Read these brief research summaries. They hilight the widespread effects of low-nurturance parenting caused by inner wounds and unawarenesses, tho the authors aren't aware of them.
Heal and educate yourself, and help your family do the same. The more you experience the benefits of wound-recovery and learning the core topics, the more prevention-minded you're apt to become!
Read any of these guidebooks that fit your current personal and professional situation. If you see value in them, tell relevant other people about them. Scan or study these related books as additional resources. No other authors explore false-self wounds or the core topics here - and their books often still have value.
Alert your co-workers, administrators, and Board members to this [wounds + unawareness + ignorance] cycle and its
and
effects. Options: -
informal discussion and referral to this course overview; -
present an in-service training seminar or series, and/or a conference seminar on the cycle or one or more of its component topics (next page); -
submit an article or series to your organization's newsletter or bulletin, -
make a presentation or program proposal to your organizational leaders and policy makers toward raising their awareness of how the cycle affects your professional mission, programs, and staff; -
do an research study to validate one or more of the premises here; and/or... -
clarify and act on your own long-term vision.
If you belong to local and/or national professional societies, alert the people responsible for professional standards, training, and licensing to the wounds + unawareness cycle, and urge them to validate these premises and incorporate them in the association's policies and goals.
Alert professionals and organizations that you network with and...
Ask your co-workers to help to alert the people you serve directly (personal contact) and indi-rectly, through community and media education.
Pause and reflect - what are you feeling and thinking about these stress-prevention options?
There are many ways you can help break the [wounds + unawareness] cycle. Pick a target group and topic/s that suit you... | | |
Target groups -
your extended-family members -
the people you serve profes-sionally, -
your co-workers, executives, and policy makers -
members and policy-makers of any professional associations you belong to -
local or national colleagues in other human-service profes-sions -
state or national legislators -
institutions which train, certify, and/or regulate human service professionals -
some or all 12-step, single-parent, teens, elderly, jail in-mates, or members of special group/s, and/or... -
needy, unaware courting couples in your area -
all children, teens, or adults in your town, county, state, country, or continent; and/or... -
a media population (e.g. news-paper, Web, or TV audience); and/or... -
people who speak your lan-guage (e.g. English) -
citizens of developing and/or low-nurturance nations -
migrants, minorities, and/or disabled people | | | |
one or more of these topics and their impacts:  | |
This table is suggestive, not definitive. Pause, breathe, and notice calmly where your thoughts go now. Anything like... |
"Ah, too much work."
"They'll think I'm nuts."
"I'm too busy."
"I'm a terrible salesperson."
"I can't speak in public."
"I don't know how to present."
"I'm not getting paid to do this."
"People don't change." |
"People will ignore me."
"My boss (or __________ ) won't go for it."
"I can't make a difference."
"People don't read brochures or newsletters."
"Let's do this later, after..."
"Who am I (to try to make a difference.)"
"Nah, too risky; too many unknowns."
"Someone else will probably do this." |
Thoughts like these are made by normal
like your Cynic / Skeptic / Critic / Perfec-tionist / Worrier / and/or Saboteur. They probably don't trust your
(capital "S"), who might say something like...
"I see value in working to prevent and reduce major social problems. I can do some of these options over time along with my regular work. I think I'll do more research on false-self wounds and/or one or more of the key topics in Lesson 1 thru 7.
Then I'll decide whether I want to try one or more of these options. I think I'll kick this around with (a trusted, like-minded colleague) and see what s/he thinks..." |
The theme of all the prevention options above is educating people on the [wounds + unaware-ness] cycle and how it impacts persons, families, organizations, and our society. If you want to edu-cate others, consider copying or building on any of the materials in this nonprofit, ad-free site to do so, rather than reinventing the wheel. Your own unique way of expression will cause the best impact | Recap
This article for lay and professional adults focuses on preventing epidemic American family stress and divorce. It proposes that average families and other human groups are significantly stressed by the adults'... -
psychological wounds from a low-nurturance childhood, -
unawareness of key internal dynamics, and... -
ignorance (lack of knowledge) of up to seven key topics.
The article invites you to study these topics and apply them to your family to gain experiential know-ledge. Then decide if you want to alert a target group of people to this pervasive [wounds + ignorance] cycle and its toxic effects.
+ + +
Next - click your professional link below for more perspective. Each profession has unique opportunities for stress prevention at all levels. Note: these articles are under construction - check back to see them evolve
Reflect: why did you read this article? Did you get what you needed? If not - what
you need now? Who's
these questions - your wise, resident
or
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Updated
October 01, 2015 |
![Break the [wounds + unawareness] cycle!](../art/hdr-cycle.gif)
