The Web
address of this quiz is https://sfhelp.org/grief/quiz3.htm
Updated
01-16-2015
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This is one
of a series of articles comprising
online
Lesson-3
in the Break the
Cycle! self-improvement course. This lesson aims to educate readers on healthy
grieving basics so they can spot and complete unfinished mourning and evolve
pro-grief relationships and families.
This self-assessment quiz can help you decide if you and/or other people need to learn more about interpersonal bonds, losses (broken
bonds), and healthy grief. The quiz exists because
incomplete grief seems to be a significant stressor for many
people, relationships, and families.
This
brief video previews the quiz you'll find below:
This quiz assumes you're familiar with...
the intro to this nonprofit web site and the
premises underlying it
Check to see if your
true Self
is
guiding
you now. If not, expect skewed results below.
Expect
to learn some useful things here;
Choose an undistracted place and time
to respond to the items below. You can't "fail" this quiz - just
learn from it!.
Print the quiz, and scan all the
items before responding. Follow any links after you finish
to learn the answers.
Rate yourself. From 1 (very ineffective griever) to 10 (very effective
griever), how effective a griever are you? ____
We'll revisit this question after you finish the quiz...
"Good Grief" Quiz
1)
Five
related
factors
that promote
widespread personal, relationship, and family stress are:
2) What is human
attachment or
bonding, and how does it
happen?
3)What
can block
the normal ability to form human bonds?
Blocked
people have little reason to grieve,
and may appear to be cold, distant, impersonal,
over-analytic, unfeeling, uncaring, detached, and aloof. Do you know anyone like that? For extra credit -
do you know what this inability to bond is
called by
professionals?
4)
In
a healthy-grieving context,
what is a
''loss''?
5)
What's the important difference between a
change and a loss
?
6)Name
the two kinds of personal losses: ____________________ and
____________________ .
7) Name at least eight common
kinds of broken
psychological bonds (losses) other than death:
8) Describe
two ways personal bonds get
broken.
9) What are the
three levels of
wholistically-healthy grieving?
(for some people)
10)
What
are the specific
phases of each of
these three levels, and how can you tell when each stage
is “done”?
23)Say your
(a) personal and (b) family grieving
policies out loud now, and where
you learned them. "No policy" is a policy!
24)Compare your current grieving policies with the
personal policies of each of your
main childhood caregivers, and of the family you grew up in. Would you say
each of these early policies promoted or hindered effective grief?
25) Name the five
most impactful physical and invisible losses (broken bonds) in your life so far:
26) On a
scale of 1 (I've never grieved this loss) to 10 (I have fully accepted
and adapted to this loss), rate how well-grieved each of these losses is now.
27)Name at least six typical
physical and invisible
losses resulting from family
separation and/or divorce:
28)
Name at least six
typical
physical and
invisible
losses typical adults and kids commonly experience from
(a) stepfamily
re/marriage and (b) combining households (cohabiting):
29)
Name five or more
reasons that incomplete
grief in an adult or child causes major personal and relationship problems.
__ 30)
Describe
_ the difference between active grieving and
depression, and _ how to react to each of
these
in _ myself and _ other
people I care about.
31)
On a scale
of 1 (very ineffective griever)
to 10 (very effective
griever), how effective a griever are you?
____. How does this compare with
your pre-quiz rating? Would the people who know you best agree with your rating? Option:
rate the grieving effectiveness of each person you care deeply about.
Reflect - where are your thoughts now? What did you just learn? Does
"ignorance" (unawareness) as a major marital and family hazard now make more
sense to you?
Awarenesses...
Pause and reflect - what are you
aware of now? For perspective - since 1981, I've met very few people who could answer most of these
questions accurately. Option: think of the adults you know best - do
you think they could answer most of these quiz items? Would they be
interested in trying to do so? If not, they're at risk of the toxic effects
of incomplete grief.
The
good news: with your wise, resident true Self guiding you and patient study and reflection,
you can learn the
answers to all of these quiz items and enhance your ability to do
good grief. Doing
this is vital for high family nurturance, personal
health, and healthy relationship
bonding!
Is there someone else you'd like to discuss this quiz and related info with?
If so, is anything in the way of your doing so now?
Pause, breathe, and recall why you took this quiz on healthy-grief basics. Did you get what you
needed? If not - what do you need?
Who's answering these questions - your wise, resident
true Self,
or
''someone else''?