1) Assess co-parents and kids for false-self wounds, and heal any you find

2) Grow and use seven effective-communication skills

3) Accept your stepfamily identity,  and resolve membership conflicts

4) Change stepfamily myths into realistic expectations

5) Learn good-grief basics,  assess for blocked grief, and free it up  to-gether

6) Draft a stepfamily mission state-ment and negotiate co-parent responsibilities

7) Each co-parent make three wise courtship choices

8) Nurture your primary relation-ship despite many distractions

9) Merge three or more multi-generational biofamilies, and resolve many conflicts.

10) Overcome barriers to evolve an effective co-parenting team, and nurture all adults and kids

11) Form and use an effective co-parent support network

12) Regularly balance four do-mains, and enjoy building your stepfamily!