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About "I" Messages
A more effective way to
your needs than hinting,
or blameful "you" messages
has 2 or 3 parts:
"When you
(describe your
partner's behavior fac-tually, in a way that could be recorded on tape)...
... then (describe
factually and specifically how your life is affected);"
(optional)
"and I need
you to..." (describe a spe-cific change you need, and perhaps a con-sequence if
your partner declines to make it.
Example: "Pat, (a) when you
keep working on the PC when I'm talking
to you, (b) I feel ignored and
disrespected, and (c) I need you
to want to stop and focus on me."
More detail
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